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Have you ever looked at your partner and questioned whether or not they are telling the truth? Most of us have had a slight niggle of doubt, but is it unjustified?   Deception is an everyday occurrence, with numerous studies showing its prominent usage to be a facilitator in communication. For example the usage of “white lies” can maintain and create relationships, be it a tactful reply, or just an exaggeration of the truth to gain respect. However, when lies have more salience, if detected they can indeed be the cause of relationship breakdown and divorce. A recent study found that 83% of people in a relationship believe that they would easily be able to tell if their partner is lying, but interestingly this may not be the case. It is a skill to detect deception, and people are likely to over estimate their ability at doing so. Here is some interesting information on how to detect a deceiver.   It depends on who the deceiver is. As lying causes a conflict of emotions, both guilt and desire to lie, it has effects on our behaviour. There can be a rise in body temperature and arousal from these emotions. Also, even though we may try to hide any changes in non verbal cues, it is near impossible and behavioural leakage can occur, such as lack of eye contact or postural shifts. There may be more pauses in speech, as extra time is required to form a cohesive lie. It is these differences in behaviour that can help one detect your lie. It is those who are better at hiding these behaviours which are more successful in their deception.   High self monitors are people who monitor their behaviour closely, thus have more success in controlling behavioural leakage. This talent has a positive correlation with success of deception. Men, more than women, have been found to be naturally better at controlling their behaviours, such as postural shifts during speech. Nevertheless, even when controlling behaviours, it is impossible to control every aspect of behaviour so there will be leakage that can be spotted. Look for delays in speech, the deceiver creating barriers between them and you e.g. crossing arms, lack of eye contact... Anything unusual.   It depends on what the lie is It is easier to detect a lie when you have knowledge on the matter, for example a lie about having no phone battery can be detected if their Facebook status was recently updated from their phone. However, it is also easier to detect lies about factual lies as logic can be applied to deduce whether they could or could not be feasible. However, it has been found that lies with emotional content are much harder to detect, as logic is harder to apply. Also, preprepared lies are harder to detect as being false, as due to their rehearsed nature they are more concise and to the point. The lack of pauses and speech errors makes them more believable. To spot whether the content of someone’s statement is true look for the length of the utterance and pauses, whether the person seems to be improvising on the spot, or whether the statement seems to be preprepared.     Depends on who the receiver is     In a relationship one may not expect their partner to be lying , due to their close relationship, thus they do not look for non verbal cues, however you do become accustomed to a person's actions thus it could be easier to detect a lie. This is dependent on suspicion. If one isn’t looking for a lie, they are far less likely to discover they are being lied to. However, this can backfire, as one may end up misreading cues in a desperate attempt to spot something unusual. Thus, to spot a deceiver, one should try not to think of explanations of behaviour, but rather look for things out of the ordinary.